The Open Line

Honest conversations. Real presence. Leadership people want to follow.

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The moment she felt her value.

Her fork froze halfway from plate to palate.
Her eyes froze too, staring at me like I’d just sprouted reindeer antlers.

Then she sat back and said, “Why didn’t I think of that? How could I have forgotten something I’ve done for years?”

My lunch companion—courageously taking college classes mid-career—had been thinking about picking up a retail merchandising job to bolster her finances. She’s had a fascinating career, alternating between web/print design and fine art. But like many of us in mid-career, she’s planning ahead, wanting more financial breathing room over the next decade.

So we were sitting there on one of her non-class days, chatting about setting up displays at a big retailer.

“I think it would be a cool part-time job,” she said. “Lots of organizing and visualizing. The hours would work with my classes. But I haven’t worked retail since college. Why would they hire me?”

Then came the frozen fork moment.

I said, “Oh, I don’t know… maybe because you’ve spent years setting up at art fairs and running your own shop inside the art center?”

The air shifted.
She sat back.
And she glowed.

Her whole face lit up as she talked about all the displays she’s created, the window scenes she’s built, the little experiments she’s run to catch a shopper’s eye.

In one moment, she went from deflated to confident.
From doubting her value to remembering it.
From shrinking her experience to owning it.

This is a moment so many of us long for — to finally see ourselves the way others already do.

With one simple moment of being seen and heard, she reconnected with her own brilliance.

And it got me thinking:

What if we brought more of this into our conversations at work?
What if this was how we led?

We’ve all felt flashes of this — those rare conversations where the flow is effortless and something unlocks in the other person.

But what would it look like to create those moments on purpose?

Because when I see people light up like that — in workshops, coaching sessions, or random Tuesday lunches — I can’t help but go deeper.

I keep asking myself:

What happened in that moment that allowed her to see herself?
What shifts inside my clients when collaboration improves, team dynamics soften, and relationships click into place?

These leaders come to me wanting scripts, talking points, confidence tricks, “executive presence.” But underneath all of that is something bigger:

They don’t need a better performance.
They need a better connection.

They need to move from talking at people to seeing the humans in front of them.

Because trust, influence, and impact aren’t created by polish.
Polish is for hard, shiny things.
Perfection actually pushes people away.
What draws people in — what changes relationships — is humanity.

In The Next Conversation, Jefferson Fisher talks about how people relax when they feel understood.

Not advised. Not corrected. Understood.

That’s what opens the door to real communication — and real change.

This is the work I’m leaning into:

• moving from proving to seeing
• from performing to connecting
• from talking to tuning in

We’re taking vague leadership buzzwords like “active listening” and “executive presence” and turning them into something honest and grounded.
Not scripts, but states of being.
Not tactics, but shifts in intention and attention.

So here’s your invitation this week:

Who in your world needs to be seen more clearly right now?
And what might shift if you gave them just a little more presence?

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PS: If you want to bring this kind of connection and clarity into your team next year, I’m booking a handful of January workshops right now. Simply reply to this email and we'll chat about what that looks like for you.

PPS: If you want to explore this for your own work and leadership check out these resources:

Quiet Signals

(Try these as journaling prompts)

• What’s one moment this past week where you felt understood? What made it possible?
• What would your conversations look like if your goal was simply to see the other person?
• Where in your communication are you performing instead of connecting?

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Signal Boosts

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Hi there! I'm Jackie. I help thoughtful people turn clarity + connection into the kind of leadership others want to follow. ​LinkedIn Website​