Hi there Reader,
Welcome to this edition of Meaningful eMail with the most recent takeaway and updates linked here at the top, and then a full article for your consideration.
Grab what's helpful today, then save others for future reference. You never know when you or someone in your network could use a boost!
Recent Takeaways & Updates
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3 Best Books of '24
20.5 books read! Which ones had the most impact? Which ones do I recommend the most?
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New for '25:
Mid-Career Power Session
In this powerful 90-minute session, you'll reclaim your value and start shaping your future—your way.
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Upcoming: The Next Mid-Career Remix Roundtable 1/16
Monthly conversations for clarity, confidence and career vision. Sign up for the next one: January 19. We'll discuss our gifts (see below).
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Let's Explore
Who decides what a gift is worth?
As we wrap up the holiday season, I’ve been thinking about gifts - the ones we give, the ones we receive, and the ones we often overlook. Some gifts shine brightly, demanding attention, while others carry a quiet value that can take years to truly appreciate.
Who decides what a gift is worth?
Some might say the person receiving the gift decides. They declare it useful or meaningful.
Where does that leave the gift-giver though? They spent their time, money and thoughtfulness on the gift - surely that carries some weight as well.
And if a gift isn’t used or appreciated, does it still have value?
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A few years ago, when I was at my career crossroads, I found myself reflecting deeply on the gifts I’d been given. Not the kind of gifts under a Christmas tree, but all the privileges and talents I’d been blessed with. I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude, but also the weight of guilt. Was I truly honoring those gifts? Was I doing enough?
I was trying to measure my impact and came up lacking, especially compared to the many gifts I’d been given - an idyllic childhood; a loving, supportive husband; good health - just to name a few. I’d been given these and more, and yet what had I done with them?
Reflecting on gifts—both the ones we give and those we’re born with—led me to confront a weight I hadn’t named: privilege guilt. I came across this phrase in an article as I dove deep into these thoughts & feelings. Reading that article is a moment seared in my brain.
I was sitting at my desk on a sunny day. I think it was even in the morning, from the way I remember the sun shining. My jaw dropped. My head nodded. My tears flowed. There’s something about having it named which makes the feeling seem so validated.
And that naming somehow helped me to move forward as well. The article suggested a good first step in relieving the guilt was to allow ourselves to enjoy the gifts.
The more time we spend embracing the gifts and getting to know them, our energy shifts from negative (guilt) to positive. I was relieved that this approach was different from practicing gratitude. When I did try gratitude, that’s when I would feel even more guilty! I was really grateful for these gifts - that’s why I felt I should be doing something with these privileges and talents in the first place.
Getting To Know Me
My privileges were easy to identify and embrace, but my innate strengths and talents took some work. I found myself thinking about my career skills, the awards I’d won, the promotions I’d earned, even about my social media ‘persona’.
But these didn’t feel like my natural strengths and talents. These felt like what society wanted from me, not what God wanted. I was looking for the talents HE gave ME. I deeply feel we are each unique and have a recipe that’s ours and ours alone. And THAT’S what I was searching for.
This can - and did - quickly lead into existential angst. Those big, cliché questions swirled in my head: Why am I here? What is my calling? What am I meant to do?
The answers weren’t in my resume or awards—they lay somewhere deeper.
I spent many a day in reflection, conversation, counseling, coaching, reading, studying, and training. What I found is that I was shifting my definition of value & worth from those external validations to something more authentic, rooted in who I truly am rather than what I’ve achieved.
Maybe that’s something we all deserve. Wait a minute. Strike that. I KNOW it’s something we all deserve.
Our worth lies in who we are, not in what we’ve achieved.
Discovering Your Value
The gifts we’ve been given are beautiful and worthy as they’ve been given to us. Yet their true value shines brightest when we use them to serve others.
I know I feel amazing when I use my gifts and those on the ‘receiving’ end are boosted as well.
In fact, that’s a great way to identify a gift:
expressing it energizes you and others.
Other identifiers?
- It comes naturally to you. It’s so easy for you that you might even be overlooking it, thinking it’s no big deal.
- Others seek you out for this talent. What do friends, family, and colleagues come to you for? Maybe it's your humor that lightens a heavy day. The way you activate a group of people. Your ability to arrange complicated projects.
- You’ve been able to do this for as long as you remember. These gifts can be spotted throughout your career and in your personal life as well.
So, let me ask you: what are the gifts you’ve been carrying quietly, perhaps even overlooking? What would it feel like to let them shine -not for validation, but for the joy of using them? Are you holding back because you’ve underestimated their worth - or worse, outsourced it to others to define?
As Howard Thurman so beautifully said,
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
You deserve to feel alive in your work and your life. Let your gifts light the way. The world is waiting for the gifts only you can bring.
If you’re not sure where to start, you’re not alone. That’s exactly what we’ll explore in my upcoming roundtable on January 16th. Let’s uncover what makes you come alive and how to use it to redefine your future.
Or, if you’re ready to dive deeper, book a 90-minute Power Session, where we’ll uncover your innate strengths and craft an action plan to align your gifts with your goals.
The greatest gift you can give yourself is to believe in what you’ve been given. It's time to unwrap your gift.
